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| bleek |
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#woo
Registered Member #23
Joined: Fri Nov 25 2005, 11:39PMPosts: 665 |
Found this story, thought it was funny. Yes, that means I didn't write it. "I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart. FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says “I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.” I said “WHAT??!! What was that?!” So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear… “You’re just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.” She responded to my puzzled look by saying, “Can’t you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?” Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn’t decide which one to take so I told her we’d just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you…she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn’t even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, “That’s fine, honey.” She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, “I think this is all dear, let’s go to the cashier.” I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, “No honey, I don’t feel like it.” Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT?” I then said “honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You’re just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.” And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, “Why can’t you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?” Apparently I’m not having sex tonight either." |
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| Noname|Boom |
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That one guy...
Registered Member #250
Joined: Tue May 09 2006, 11:59PMPosts: 2603 |
hahahaha pwnt. where'd you find this? cuz i want to see some more 
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| Syntax |
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Rudeboy Supreme!
Registered Member #617
Joined: Fri Mar 23 2007, 06:37AMPosts: 1252 |
Noname|Boom wrote ... hahahaha pwnt. where'd you find this? cuz i want to see some more What he said^^^ LOL! That was awesome. I also wouldnt mind reading more. |
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| Amped |
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Hi
Registered Member #301
Joined: Thu Jun 15 2006, 01:55AMPosts: 888 |
Old, seen it. | ||
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| gLiTch |
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Anal Assassin
Registered Member #455
Joined: Mon Oct 09 2006, 04:58AMPosts: 3848 |
LOL!!!!! thats fuckin HILARIOUS! I am dying laughing right now. I cant wait to show that to my girlfreind.... matter of fact, i wouldnt doubt that being me who wrote it...... since it no joke sounds VERY similar to what happened last friday. Thurs night she said those EXACT words, thats why im laughing my ass off because that shit realy happens. Friday i took off from work and we went out to eat then went to Mandees. I bought her a pair of shoes but we got into an argument when i refused to buy her this baithing suit. Then i blurted something sarcastic out similar to the argument we had the previous nightl. Thats why i find this so fuckin funny. | ||
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| Ninca |
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Registered Member #561
Joined: Sun Feb 04 2007, 07:45AMPosts: 1109 |
Amped wrote ... Seconded, however, its still hilarious.
Old, seen it. |
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| doctorphate |
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doctorphate
Registered Member #724
Joined: Wed May 30 2007, 03:50AMPosts: 699 |
he didnt find it anywhere, thats what every woman says to him lol | ||
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| Buddha |
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Boodz
Registered Member #528
Joined: Tue Jan 02 2007, 11:41PMPosts: 1085 |
I believe that's Maddox actually. | ||
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| BeaN |
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Damnit Bean.
Registered Member #666
Joined: Fri Apr 13 2007, 02:58AMPosts: 62 |
hahahahaha god story. | ||
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| .neXTt |
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Registered Member #507
Joined: Thu Dec 14 2006, 01:42PMPosts: 539 |
lol that was good =P | ||
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