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| Gates vs. GM | ||
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| VuLtUrE |
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Registered Member #394
Joined: Tue Aug 22 2006, 05:20AMPosts: 115 |
Gates vs. GM For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on. At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon." In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating: If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this part): 1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash........ Twice a day. 2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car. 3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this. 4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine. 5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads. 6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light. I love the next one!!! 7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying. 8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna. 9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car. 10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off. LMAO! Edited Mon Mar 12 2007, 02:20PM |
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| Wildcard23 |
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Registered Member #514
Joined: Wed Dec 20 2006, 06:33AMPosts: 1067 |
ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sweet. Good find Vulture. Apple FTW!!!!!! 
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| .4ngryToasters |
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you would
Registered Member #149
Joined: Sun Feb 12 2006, 01:08AMPosts: 2039 |
haha, Bill Gates got owned | ||
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| emerican |
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Registered Member #164
Joined: Tue Mar 07 2006, 12:07PMPosts: 3146 |
lol i saw this a while back. funny shit | ||
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| Knightrider |
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Meteor 2016
Registered Member #316
Joined: Mon Jun 26 2006, 09:14PMPosts: 3503 |
Haha. I wonder what Bill Gates thought when he read that. I bet he was like, shit man, I got owned. | ||
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| nostie |
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Registered Member #185
Joined: Thu Mar 30 2006, 10:42PMPosts: 3167 |
probably like "ahh shit gotta fire my PR guys" | ||
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| Ninca |
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Registered Member #561
Joined: Sun Feb 04 2007, 07:45AMPosts: 1109 |
he probably looked for his money, then donated it to some charity as a ploy =P | ||
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| .4ngryToasters |
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you would
Registered Member #149
Joined: Sun Feb 12 2006, 01:08AM Posts: 2039 |
GM missed a few: Your windsheild would be covered with adds to enlarge your penis. Windsheild wipers would be improved to cope with this, but within a week, the adds will start to get through again. You would have to scan your car before openning the door, otherwise you could catch a nasty cold. Opening your garage door would result in you being bombarbed by salesmen with spam, soviet spies, and 12 different types of worms. Every car would run off a slightly different type of fuel, and you would have to buy a converter for every type. |
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| TwItcH |
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Registered Member #251
Joined: Wed May 10 2006, 10:47AMPosts: 227 |
those mo fuckas just owned Bill Gates | ||
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| VuLtUrE |
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Registered Member #394
Joined: Tue Aug 22 2006, 05:20AM Posts: 115 |
.4ngryToasters wrote ... GM missed a few: Your windsheild would be covered with adds to enlarge your penis. Windsheild wipers would be improved to cope with this, but within a week, the adds will start to get through again. You would have to scan your car before openning the door, otherwise you could catch a nasty cold. OMG! LMAO! Toaster that was awsome dude! .4ngryToasters wrote ...
Edited Wed Mar 14 2007, 12:02AM
Opening your garage door would result in you being bombarbed by salesmen with spam, soviet spies, and 12 different types of worms. Every car would run off a slightly different type of fuel, and you would have to buy a converter for every type. |
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