b4ndito wrote ...

The two most important things about driving, in this order:

1. Always focus on driving; keeping in your lane, watching your speed, and paying attention to your surroundings. It'll keep you from getting into a wreck or killing yourself. Driving 15 mph over the limit doesn't make you cool or get you where you're going that much faster. It makes you wreck your car and pay out a lot of insurance money.

2. Learn to parallel park because if you can't do it properly you can just cut your dick off and feed it to the dogs because, for all intents and purposes, you are now a woman.


Miscellaneous tips:

-Learn to take care of your car, i.e. changing/checking oil, tire pressure/changing tires, etc.

-If you have to put a special muffler on your car to make it sound manly, you need to buy a new car. Your 1994 Honda Civic is not a cool car, it will never sound good, and spray painting it black will just prove to everyone around you that you are a determined candidate for euthanasia.

-Don't tailgate or speed into red lights. You'll just waste gas and probably wreck yourself.

-Stay away from other cars whenever possible.

-Don't keep drugs of any kind in your car (or alcohol if you're underage); you're black, and the cops will take any excuse to pull you over and search you. I'm not being racist, it's the truth.

-Don't put money into supping a car that isn't worth anything. For example, I am nursing my car along with the basics because I don't want to have to buy a new one before I'm out of school. Save up for a cool car, don't convert a shitty piece of shit.