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Jesus not HeyZeus
Registered Member #370
Joined: Mon Jul 31 2006, 03:49AMPosts: 332 |
HAHAHAHA well i went on here and made an account and made one post and already got banned from their forums here is the post i made in reply to a thread entitled can i get an amen I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces of wood. I credit that eight years of grammar school with nourishing me in a direction where I could trust myself and trust my instincts. They gave me the tools to reject my faith. They taught me to question and think for myself and to believe in my instincts to such an extent that I just said, "This is a wonderful fairy tale they have going here, but it's not for me."If this [word] offends you, welcome to the world of sane and realistic critical thought. More harm has been done to the collective human psyche by religion than by all the f@#$ing and c#$%sucking since the dawn of time. By the way, many religious people (including the ordained) f#$k and suck each other's c@#$s all the time. I've begun worshipping the Sun for a number of reasons. First of all, unlike some other gods I could mention, I can see the Sun. It's there for me every day. And the things it brings me are quite apparent all the time: heat, light, food, a lovely day. There's no mystery, no one asks for money, I don't have to dress up, and there's no boring pageantry. And interestingly enough, I have found that the prayers I offer to the sun and the prayers I formerly offered to God are all answered at about the same 50-percent rate. I don't have any beliefs or allegiances. I don't believe in this country, I don't believe in religion, or a god, and I don't believe in all these man-made institutional ideas. I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it. In the Bullshit Department, a businessman can't hold a candle to a clergyman. 'Cause I gotta tell you the truth, folks. When it comes to bullshit, big-time, major league bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims: religion. No contest. No contest. Religion. Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told. Think about it. Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man -- living in the sky -- who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever 'til the end of time! But He loves you. He loves you, and He needs money! He always needs money! He's all-powerful, all-perfect, all-knowing, and all-wise, somehow just can't handle money! Religion takes in billions of dollars, they pay no taxes, and they always need a little more. Now, you talk about a good bullshit story. Holy ****! You know who I pray to? Joe Pesci. Joe Pesci. Two reasons; first of all, I think he's a good actor. Okay. To me, that counts. Second; he looks like a guy who can get things done. Joe Pesci doesn't **** around. Doesn't **** around. In fact, Joe Pesci came through on a couple of things that God was having trouble with. For years I asked God to do something about my noisy neighbor with the barking dog. Joe Pesci straightened that cock-sucker out with one visit. I noticed that of all the prayers I used to offer to God, and all the prayers that I now offer to Joe Pesci, are being answered at about the same 50 percent rate. Half the time I get what I want. Half the time I don't. Same as God 50-50. Same as the four leaf clover, the horse shoe, the rabbit's foot, and the wishing well. Same as the mojo man. Same as the voodoo lady who tells your fortune by squeezing the goat's testicles. It's all the same; 50-50. So just pick your superstitions, sit back, make a wish and enjoy yourself. And for those of you that look to the Bible for it's literary qualities and moral lessons; I got a couple other stories I might like to recommend for you. You might enjoy The Three Little Pigs. That's a good one. It has a nice happy ending. Then there's Little Red Riding Hood. Although it does have that one X-rated part where the Big Bad Wolf actually eats the grandmother. Which I didn't care for, by the way. And finally, I've always drawn a great deal of moral comfort from Humpty Dumpty. The part I liked best: "and all the king's horses, and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty together again." That's because there is no Humpty Dumpty, and there is no God. None. Not one. Never was. No God. If this is the best God can do, I'm not impressed. I gotta say that george carlin is the man and i totally agree with him 100% i got banned for that how close minded are these people haha got around their "ban" too easy nywayz one last post then im done COUGH COUGH LOSERS COUGH COUGH DEVIL WORSHIPPING FTW You guys are all closed minded and can't accept the opinions of others nor can you accept science and the fact that THERE IS NO INVISIBLE MAN IN THE SKY I really hope that you guys know that the real world is not perfect or anywhere near it and all I have to say is that if there was a god he would be doing a terrible job because of all of the things going on in the world right now Once again YOU GOT PWNED YOU NUBS GO DARWINISM and GO PERKELE ( for all of you who don't know who that is he is the great grandfather of SATAN) Edited Thu Oct 05 2006, 12:28AM |
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The All-Cum Diet
Registered Member #47
Joined: Mon Dec 05 2005, 04:55PMPosts: 1888 |
Haha, very nice, Jesus. These people are fucking crazy. What's next rationalizing guns? "We, as Christians, love guns. We encourage fellowship by popping a cap in thy fellow neighbor." |
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| Knightrider |
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Meteor 2016
Registered Member #316
Joined: Mon Jun 26 2006, 09:14PMPosts: 3503 |
Im offended.... The whole point of this thread pisses me off. In fact, my face is actually hot and burning with anger. Sure, I dont like the idea of them actually making a clan for counter strike and saying they "Play for Jesus". But even then, I am a Christian and you are entitled to your opinions, but this is just too fucking far. I wouldnt expect this from any of you.. You all have to remember that not everyone here worships satan or promotes athiesm. Edited Thu Oct 05 2006, 02:24AM |
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The All-Cum Diet
Registered Member #47
Joined: Mon Dec 05 2005, 04:55PM Posts: 1888 |
We just find humor in the little things. | ||
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Meteor 2016
Registered Member #316
Joined: Mon Jun 26 2006, 09:14PM Posts: 3503 |
I didnt find anything that Jesus said "Humorous" at all. In fact, even his name mocks what I believe in. I've never said anything about anyone else's religeon here? So why go and insult mine? Why go to a clan site full of us and mock the living hell out of them just because you want to do it for a joke? Why can't you just go let them believe what they want? The point I'm trying to make is that even though they made something like that which is entirely pointless, you didnt have to write that Jesus. That was too fucking far to begin with in the first place. Why is it that the Christian faith is always the faith that has to be mocked? Go find a group of fucking monks or Buddhists to mock. In fact, this furthermore brings more questions. Why do people say "Goddamn!" or "Jesus Christ" or refer to anything like that if they dont fucking believe he exists? Why not use another religeon? If I wanted to hear my faith being mocked, I would have flew over to fucking Iraq and let them kill me. I wouldnt expect everyone here to go and rape the Christian faith because they think its a fucking joke. |
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The All-Cum Diet
Registered Member #47
Joined: Mon Dec 05 2005, 04:55PM Posts: 1888 |
Nevertheless, Night, like you implied, to each his own. I find this shit funny as hell. But, my finding it funny doesn't mean that I do or don't believe in something. Christians bring this shit on themselves. They think they are so right; that they, and only they, have the "real truth". If you want to see something even funnier (more pathetic) check out this -[link]- Yay! Christians brainwashing children and making them pray to a cardboard cut-out of George W. Bush.  |
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Meteor 2016
Registered Member #316
Joined: Mon Jun 26 2006, 09:14PM Posts: 3503 |
Id like to say that your response to "Christianity" is a jump to a conclusion. You say that Christians are trying to push and force their religeon into others? Thats just an idealization. I know that Im not that way, and I know that my best friends as well as my church are not that way. No, I dont think I am so right. In fact, if I die, and there is no God, then so be it. I would just like to say, that there is enough common sense to prove that he is here. Gee, remember the evolutionary theory that was invented by Darwin? Hmm, if I researched correctly, before he died, he gave up his theory and converted to Christianity. This will be taken out of schools real soon, if not already. Nevertheless, people believe in the "Big Bang Theory". Common sense would tell you that something isnt just going to explode out of shit. Something has to have created us, and something has to reward us for all the pain and bullshit that we are sent through each and every day of our lives. I can almost guarentee you that I have had the worst life at this place, and the only thing that has kept me alive was the fact that I believed in God and his son. And the comment made about giving to churches? No, it doesnt go towards God, you dont give money to God. The money that is collected in my church goes to the people that are in poverty in my town. And the rest goes to Missionary funding so we can spread the word around the world to people that dont know. It doesnt go to "God." You might be thinking of the Catholic religeon, because I dont know what their money goes to. But what Im trying to say Fetus, is that is the generalization that people give today about Christians. Our religeon gets persecuted more than others and it makes sense more then theirs. Yes, people that are in the form of Christianity force their religeons into others, I know people that are like that. But its not all of us, thats just a Stereotype. |
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The All-Cum Diet
Registered Member #47
Joined: Mon Dec 05 2005, 04:55PM Posts: 1888 |
-[link]- | ||
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Meteor 2016
Registered Member #316
Joined: Mon Jun 26 2006, 09:14PM Posts: 3503 |
I dont like their idealization of a movement. Speaking in toungues is creepy and sounds satanic, to say the least. Nor do I like the George Bush cut out. George Bush is the most horrible example of someone to pray in front of, because well we all know that he lied and lies. But even then, thats not proving anything against christianity at all. The whole point of that video was to show how some lady is trying to organize evangelist movements. I dont get what your trying to prove to me by showing me that. | ||
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The All-Cum Diet
Registered Member #47
Joined: Mon Dec 05 2005, 04:55PM Posts: 1888 |
I'm not really making a point, Night. I like making fun of stupid shit. You like making fun of people as well. Just look at the words above your avatar. It takes a big man to cry, but a bigger one to laugh at that man Now, given, those may not be "your" words, but you must buy into the idea that making fun of someone/something is funny.      |
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