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| WTF? so I was taking a dump in the bathroom of Barnes & Noble.. | ||
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| Wu-banga |
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Registered Member #49
Joined: Tue Dec 06 2005, 01:37AMPosts: 1561 |
Now I never go number 2 in public but I felt like I was about to have fecal confetti burst out of my anus. I figured since my Barnes & Noble has 2 floors I would use the second story bathroom since there are less people up there, it's quiet and there's not too much traffic so I figured I would be okay So I went there, to an empty bathroom, for the relief of my bodily wastes. As I sat there, thinking about world peace and such, I hear someone walk in to go in the stall and blow his nose. So I thought, "okay, it's just some guy who needed to blow his nose". He then walks out of the stall and kicks the side of my stall. He says: Hey, this is Charles, good morning. Me: *remains silent* Guy: HEY, THIS IS CHARLES, HOWS IT GOIN'? Me: Uh.. fine? Guy: Do you skate? Me: Uh.. no. Guy: Are you good at skating? Me. No. Guy: Do you even know how to skate? Me: No. Guy: Are you good at taking a shit? Me: Damn right, I am. Guy: Are you in a frat? Me: No.. Guy: Well, I'm Charles. Do you know who Charles is? Me: No. Guy: IT'S ME YOU IDIOT! *He kicks my stall again* Me: (oh shit) Guy: Do you want to see something cool? Me: Uh, not really. (OMG he's going to break down my stall door and rape me in the ass) Guy: Listen to this *he pulls out his cell phone and plays a ringtone* Guy: Do you know who this is? Me: No *he plays another ringtone* Guy: Well what about this one? Me: Yeah, I've heard that song. Guy: Who is it? Me: That's Beyonce. Guy: Good job. Now who is this? *plays a rock song* Me: Uhhh.. I'm not sure. Guy: It's The White Stripes you fucking idiot! Me. Oh.. ok. *starts to wipe my ass in a panic* *he plays a few more Top 40 songs for me to guess while I wipe my ass.* *I stand up* Guy: Well, it's been fun. See ya. Me: Uh.. ok. Thanks for making my shit more enjoyable. dude, wtf Edited Thu Mar 20 2008, 09:26AM |
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| Postman |
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Registered Member #926
Joined: Sat Dec 01 2007, 07:20AMPosts: 253 |
first. | ||
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| Buddha |
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Boodz
Registered Member #528
Joined: Tue Jan 02 2007, 11:41PMPosts: 1085 |
lol, that was YOU!? | ||
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| slick |
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Registered Member #877
Joined: Tue Oct 02 2007, 07:21PMPosts: 663 |
damn... If only I can be like Wu. If wrote storys every week, I would improve my grammar so much and probably my vocabular. lol Maybe this place is Wu diary where he writes everything in haha 
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| gLiTch |
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Anal Assassin
Registered Member #455
Joined: Mon Oct 09 2006, 04:58AMPosts: 3848 |
rofl... ive had some weird shitting moments in my life.... i would amaze this whole forum if i told my stories... Put it this way... me and my best friend have a game to see who shits in the most random places, and has the most random things happen to them. Im currently in the lead. Ive taken a dump in almost every state on the east coast. Ive taken a dump 48 stories high. Ive taken a dump at 3 different colleges. Ive taken a dump in a girls bathroom at my girlfriends high school. Ive taken a dump at a policemans private house in new jersey while me and my friend hit on his daughter (my winning one atm). Ive taken a dump in the Atlantic Ocean. These are just a few of my stories... My most recent one was in my current college. Im sitting there.. listening to all the immature fuckers outside making jokes how im shitting. Then they leave and i have peace and quiet for 5 minutes. All of a sudden someone else comes in. And he starts saying loudly, "Oh yea, fuck that shit yea. Fuck you Mr. Jeffrey. Fuck im the man. Fuck yea yea yea." Im sitting there like.... wtf is this guy on?lol... He blows his nose in the stall next to me, then proceeds to take a second piss there, after he just took one in the urinal.... like damn... Then he sees my feet underneath the stall, and it goes quiet. He calmly walks out giggling like a girl... wtf dude i mean come on lol.. Edited Thu Mar 20 2008, 08:52PM |
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| NoSkill |
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Sir
Registered Member #457
Joined: Tue Oct 10 2006, 01:13PMPosts: 2628 |
Wtf? Let's see interesting shit story interesting shit story... hmm... Well you ever notice how after a day at the beach your shit smells the same, like all the time. It smells like... sandy shit lol... One time I had to wipe my ass with a towel because there wasn't any toilet paper and I forget to check. One time in high school I had to switch stalls with my pants around my ankles and my ass all shitty because the toilet paper was caked in urin, that sucked. One time I shit my pants drunk and had to drive home in my shitty pants and throw away my boxers when I got home. Not the proudest moment of my life. |
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| Maddogme |
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Registered Member #964
Joined: Sat Jan 12 2008, 07:23PMPosts: 1776 |
Well... I had to take a shit at a mountians once.. but.. yeah.. My friend took a shit in a 7 eleven hot dog box at a school outside. Then he threw it on the tree.. It was.. an interesting day. | ||
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| Noname|Boom |
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That one guy...
Registered Member #250
Joined: Tue May 09 2006, 11:59PMPosts: 2603 |
I actually lol'd for a while. | ||
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| *Kill Time* |
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Registered Member #543
Joined: Sun Jan 21 2007, 06:33AMPosts: 497 |
Buddha wrote ... lol, that was YOU!? ROFL! |
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| Zero |
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I want to fuck your hand.
Registered Member #571
Joined: Thu Feb 15 2007, 09:59PMPosts: 2809 |
best shit ever: I shit on a wal-marts floor and proceeded to wipe my ass, throw those tissues in the toilet, BUT I wrapped the steaming pile of crap with a bunch of toilet paper trailing around so someone would see it and think it was just a mess of toilet paper. Basically covered the floor with toilet paper so when they went to clean it up *squish* my other legendary shit was in a river near a waterfall, because it was common for like 30 people to be swimming at the bottom of it 
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