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| I killed my cousin's fetus. | ||
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| kevin |
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AKA cupcake
Registered Member #374
Joined: Fri Aug 04 2006, 03:38AMPosts: 858 |
This happened around this time last year. My cousin, who was 24 at the time, invited the entire family to her birthday. She was already married and living in a nice house in the suburbs. When everyone arrived and sat around the table, she suddenly stood-up and said: "I have some great news. I'm pregnant!". Everyone cheered and happily proceeded with the meal. Everyone but me, for in my head, an idea began to take form... I waited for five months, and then, one night, I biked to her house. When I arrived it was already morning, just as I planed. I waited for her husband to leave, and then I got out of the car and approached the door of her house. I knocked and after a while she opened the door. Her belly was already swollen, an evidence of the small life it contained. She was surprised to see me, but before she could say anything, I kicked her in the stomach. She flew backwards with a look of shock and pleasure over her face. She hit her head on the floor and passed out. I noticed her pants began to soak with blood at the no-no area. Without stopping, I took her pants and underwear off and started to stomp on her stomach. Finally, the fetus flew out like a cannon ball. It hit the door and slid down, leaving a trail of blood. I did the chicken dance, and then proceeded to grab and fetus and run away. I ran for hours, pressing the fetus against my chest. Finally I got to a small, deserted parking lot. I couldn't stop myself anymore. I started to tickle the fetus, chanting the lyrics to "U Can't Touch This". When I got to "hammer time", I threw the fetus in the air and caught it with my teeth. I ran wildly for another hour, and I heard a siren. A second later I saw a flashing light, changing from blue to red and back again. The police car stopped in front of me, and two burly policemen came out. One of them pulled the fetus out of my mouth with the strength of a thousand men. He asked me in a loud voice: "What the fucking shit is that you asshole? Are you a fucking nut or some shit?". I licked his face, and lay on the ground. I got arrested, but was later released because I look a bit like Popeye and the judge was fond of it. |
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| nostie |
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Registered Member #185
Joined: Thu Mar 30 2006, 10:42PMPosts: 3167 |
good call bro, good call. | ||
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| bleek |
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#woo
Registered Member #23
Joined: Fri Nov 25 2005, 11:39PMPosts: 665 |
I would have raped the lil' guy. | ||
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| Czech Pride |
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Registered Member #518
Joined: Wed Dec 27 2006, 01:15AMPosts: 911 |
I dont know what to say....awesome?? | ||
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| Noname|Boom |
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That one guy...
Registered Member #250
Joined: Tue May 09 2006, 11:59PMPosts: 2603 |
im sorry kevin, but you fail to make as good as stories as wu. <3 ur just another bleek 
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| kevin |
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AKA cupcake
Registered Member #374
Joined: Fri Aug 04 2006, 03:38AM Posts: 858 |
I just wanted to try... | ||
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| Noname|Boom |
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That one guy...
Registered Member #250
Joined: Tue May 09 2006, 11:59PM Posts: 2603 |
kevin wrote ... I just wanted to try...  It's ok... I understand
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| Syntax |
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Rudeboy Supreme!
Registered Member #617
Joined: Fri Mar 23 2007, 06:37AMPosts: 1252 |
NO NoName, that was a very worthy first attemp, I think you and Wu should both make stories, cuz yours made me luagh my ass off! | ||
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| Noname|Boom |
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That one guy...
Registered Member #250
Joined: Tue May 09 2006, 11:59PM Posts: 2603 |
Goat wrote ... but NO one can rival Wu's stories (trust me).
NO NoName, that was a very worthy first attemp, I think you and Wu should both make stories, cuz yours made me luagh my ass off! |
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| Ninca |
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Registered Member #561
Joined: Sun Feb 04 2007, 07:45AMPosts: 1109 |
First off, you biked there and then got out of your car. I stopped believing it then  . Overall not too bad though.
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